Its 2:20 am. We were playing a game of poker earlier, in which I did quite well for myself, and then I came over to the computer lab to poke around, hoping some people would be online. The trouble with that is that they never are, and now I’ve been sitting around for an hour hoping they will be. This is why the internet is evil. Its like gambling. Each minute spent seems insignificant, but they add up to be a lot of time. There are two other people in here with me.

Anyway, today we went to get money from the bank, which was quite an experience, and then bought a bunch of foods and stuff, basically preparing for site. Tomorrow morning we swear in, which is exciting. I’ll be wearing some Guinean clothes that are pretty awesome, and I’ll make sure to post pictures when I get a chance on the computers.

What else…I bought a bar of chocolate and it was awesome. I took a nap. I did a crossword. We went to the ACPD’s house for dinner and it was amazing. She had real sour cream, guacamole, salsa with pineapple, and fantastical beans and rice. Cumin is an amazing spice. My stomach nearly exploded, not in the least because it has become severely shrunken over the past couple months.

Also I weighed myself, and am down 10-15 pounds. Not as much as some, who lost 20-25, but about 10 seems to be average. All of us feel like our arms and faces look thinner. Hopefully as we get to site and can make our own food we’ll get some of that weight back.

I don’t remember if I’ve talked about my plans for food, but basically when I think my food related future I get really excited. Its almost avocado season. Mango season starts in a couple months. I have tomatoes and onions and garlic and cucumbers basically year round. Pineapples are findable. If you can’t see where I am going with this, let me spell it out: mango salsa every day, eaten with varieties of fried dough, beans and rice, and other goodness. And lets not forget the guacamole. There’s also jam and pickling. Mango jam, pineapple jam, pickles, pickled mangos, pickled mangos and piment, etc… I also want to do some making of dried mangos and pineapple, and also cheese. I’m pretty sure I could spend my whole service just making food. Once I get chose set up to be able to cook, I will be pretty happy.

I have a vision for my day that involves drinking tea in the morning on my front steps, while I eat rice bouille, perhaps with some pieces of mango or banana thrown in, and converse with neighbors. Not sure what happens after that, but that seems like a pretty respectable start.

I just put a bunch of new posts from the past month or more. Also, here are some photos:

A giant spider that will eat your face. There are about 10 in my bathroom.

My host brother and sister.

All the stagiares in their amazing clothes. By amazing I mean really amazing, not crazy.

Saying goodbye to my host family and going through the process of finding gifts for them and saying thanks, I’ve been reflecting on how I really like final gestures like goodbyes and thanks, but that I could really work on giving thanks for the small things during the time I know someone. During the eight weeks I lived with my family here, I spent a lot of time wishing I didn’t have to listen to babies cry or people fight. But in retrospect my family was very nice, in that they really tried to listen to me and to teach me things, without being overbearing. I have a feeling that I’m going to miss that when I get to sight and have to deal with a very enthusiastic and overbearing counterpart. Not that that is bad either, as I’d rather have a motivated counterpart than someone who doesn’t really care.

Anyway, think of how much more I would get out of relationships if I made the effort to let someone know I appreciated them while we still had time together. I’m gonna have to work on that.

And our stagiare who ET’d is not ETing after all! That’s pretty exciting. Tomorrow we have a farewell ceremony and then Friday we swear in, using the exact same oath as that of the vice president. I never was particularly patriotic, but I wouldn’t be surprised if I got a little teary-eyed during the oath. Oaths in general make me emotional, I guess I feel like they really mean something, an uncommon view these days I know. Call me old fashioned. In fact, I think I am actually becoming more old fashioned as I age. Its like as I get older my tastes are going back in years (thankfully skipping the 80s, 70s, and 60s). I’m probably around 1920 right about now, but part of me has successfully regressed to medieval chivalrous times or something.

There is a phrase from a book that I think of often, it goes something like this “form is everything, intent is nothing.” Like “actions speak louder than words,” only it makes me think of the conflict of acting with respect regardless of how you feel.

The first person from our group ET’d today. It was a big blow for me, and I feel for him. I was looking forward to getting to know him better, and I think we would have become very good friends. There are probably only ever a few people in stage like that, so it sucks to lose one of them.
But as rough as I feel right now, I’m sure he’s in much worse shape. The feelings of failure, shame, guilt, and just the social pressure not to leave are huge, so he probably feels pretty badly about himself right now, which is too bad. I feel like he should be proud that he made it two months in a country that is supposed to be one of the hardest places to do a Peace Corps service. So anyway, here’s to you. By far most people in the United States will not have the courage to do what you did, and that makes you strong for trying, not weak for failing.

I made vrai spaghetti for my family ce soir. I don’t think they liked it, though I thought it was fantastic. They ate it out of politeness, but they had rice ready to mange when we were done. We’re in the end game now, having finished our last presentation this morning and having only the language test on Monday before all necessary assignments are finished.

There is a decided mix of fear and excitement in the air as we prepare to leave for site. And where as a week ago we seemed fed up with each other, there is a marked friendliness between nearly everyone as we realize that we won’t really see much of each other after next week. This is especially true for those fellow volunteers in separate regions.