I found a book of Hemmingway’s short stories amongst the things left over from COSing volunteers. I had forgotten the profound ache that his writing imparts to me. I just read “The Short Happy Life of Francis Macomber”. His portrayal of cowardice and courage, and the plain meanness of people toward each other, shows the deep painful side of life, and there is no denying it. In Africa I laugh as I have never laughed before. I have found a confidence and finally given up the ghosts that were attached to my heels (at least for now). But the impermanence of life, the inevitable breakdown of love into some vague annoyance, the quiet suffering of great persons, these things do not beckon me to laugh or to shout my happy defiance into the rain. They ask instead that I sit quietly and alone and give that inner ache the bearth that it demands. Life, so opportuning of rapture, is joyously malicious.
There are many ways to struggle. I admire Hemmingway’s.
Totally agree – Hemingway is incredible. For Whom the Bell Tolls was a favorite Peace Corps read of mine.
Really enjoying your updates, Nick. Keep ‘em coming!
-Raph